do it scared

God I can’t think straight because of all the fear that’s on my mind. I’m scared about the country. I’ scared about the future. I’m scared for my kid. I’m scared for my family. I’m scared. Totally. Completely. Scared. And here I am at your feet hoping to exchange this fear for something better that you might have. I don’t want to be scared anymore. The minute I feel like i’ve gotten over one fear, here comes the next.

“And?”

And I feel ashamed. Ashamed that I”m so scared, because I know that that means that I don’t trust you fully. And I want to trust you fully. I want to believe and trust in you so much that I never fear again.

“All fear isn’t bad.”

Fear isn’t bad? The fear of you isn’t bad. Holy fear - that awe of you is healthy. Maybe instead of being afraid of everything else in front of me I should be more afraid of not being as near to you as possible. How do I get over being scared?

“You don’t get over it. You hold my hand and we’ll walk through it. Together.”

I’ll still be scared!

“That’s ok. You can do it scared.”

Whatever it is I’m scared of, you’ll be right there to hold my hand and walk me through it. I don’t have to feel differently about the situation for me to still obey and do it anyway. God with you, for you, I’ll do it scared.

“That’s how you’ll become brave.”